Covid is finally not so heavy on us anymore.

I chanced upon a precious person that doesn't see me only as a sex toy.

I've been disillusioned. It took about 7 to 8 years to realize I was in the wrong relationship before this one. 

I'm in a job that actually acknowledges that I'm human and I have to rest come night time.

Everything isn't the way I envisioned it. But also... Everything is beyond how I imagined it.

Yes, I don't have my own family now, but I'm with someone I can fully trust and love, and those get reciprocated.

Yes, I don't have my dream career track of becoming some advertising rockstar, but I have a job that lets me use my talents and skills for authentic community engagement. 

Yes, I don't have a mega-KOL cosplay career, but I have cosplay friends that believe in what I do.

I will always be grateful for what I've gone through, despite how fucked up everything was before. 

I hope I get to post something nicer??? for my next blog entry.

It's been a while, Ameba. 

all I wanna do is die

While away the seconds in dead ambition

Throw away the minutes to blind submission

to the flow of time

to the magnetism of mediocrity.

Most of the time

all I wanna do is sigh

As I lose sight of what I have in front of me

As I deny the existence of responsibilities

away from the murmurs

stashed away from their consciousness. 

Most of the time.

I don't think of the time. 

And wonder if time thinks about how useless it has become. 

:) Hi!